This is a paper I had to write for my Theology class. I had to interview a married couple. I chose my grandparents.
A marriage takes many different aspects to work. Marriage is a combination of friendship, love, romance, compassion, teamwork, dreams, honesty, communication, and strength to name a few. I interviewed my grandparents on their thoughts of marriage. What it takes, what love is, what made it last 51 years? When asked what it takes to make a marriage work, my grandfather’s key point was “give and take.” It takes work from both sides to make a successful marriage. One person cannot be doing all the work, and neither can do nothing. It is a balance. From my grandmother’s perspective, both must be “considerate of their spouse and work with them.” Marriage is like a team that is brought together for the rest of their lives. My grandmother notes, “it is a 24-hour job.” And that it is. According to my grandmother, marriage takes a lot of communication. What do they think love entails? To my grandfather, love entails “being cooperative with one another and giving of oneself.” So simply said, yet so true. My grandmother believes very strongly that love entails selflessness and blind commitment. You have to trust without knowing if they’re going to catch you. You have to believe in the good in them because of love without knowing if any of it is real. You have to believe in love. To a granddaughter who does not see her grandparents show affection that often, I was curious to hear their take on how important romance is on a daily basis. Both of them seemed to agree that it is important to show affection, but romance on a daily basis is not necessary to keep a marriage alive. After fifty years, romance must still be in a marriage to make it work, but love is integrated into every aspect of the relationship and romance is not necessary to keep it alive. Lastly, you may be wondering what has made their 51-year marriage last. I think my grandfather put it better than anyone ever could: “Patience and faith.” Patience and faith has kept their marriage afloat for 51 years, and I think that is a lesson for everyone to learn. Patience with each other, patience with yourself, patience with your children, patience with life! Faith through the good times, faith through the bad times, faith in each other, faith in life, and faith in God. That is what makes any relationship last—especially the bond of marriage. Patience and faith are the glue.
My grandparents are simple in their ways and do not like to talk about love that often, but it seems to me they’ve got it down. And it works for them. To me, love is different for everyone. I think that you can try to put love into all these beautiful words but when it comes down to it, love is love. Love is a bond that encompasses emotions, daily lives, mind, body, soul, and all being. It is painful yet amazing and nothing can replace it. It is the ultimate oxymoron and paradox of our world. The Beatles seemed to have the right idea when they so plainly put it, “All we need is love.” And the cliché “love makes the world go round,” is not a cliché you should overlook so quickly. A love for someone never leaves. Marriage, just like any other relationship is made of love, compromise, communication, honesty, selflessness, and teamwork. A marriage is the ultimate bond between two people who love each other. I believe just as my grandfather said, that patience and faith along with honesty, trust, communication, and love are what keep marriage afloat. Without those qualities, what foundation do you have for the life you’re building in communion with someone else?
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